My shit stinks. Literally. I have troubles with digestion. Irritable bowel syndrome, issues with some dairy and my pee smells when I eat asparagus. Wait, scratch that last one.

Seriously though, I have pretty regular issues with being regular. It’s been that way since I was a child. Once, I even had to go to the Emergency Room because I was severely constipated and in serious pain.

Things never got better, but they became more manageable as an adult. Laxatives, fiber supplements, Lactaid, prune juice. All of that good stuff.

What’s even more concerning is the issues I have with dairy as I have gotten older. Not all dairy mind you, for some reason I never had issues with cheese. Milk, yogurt (Greek and domestic) and ice cream are pretty much off limits unless I really want to get things moving, in the worst possible way.

Wait, this was supposed to be a post about kombucha. So the thing is, I got to thinking that perhaps my gut bacteria were all out of whack from years of drinking and eating like shit. Kombucha is high in those bacteria and easy to work into my routine. More so than say, eating sauerkraut more regularly.

I went ahead and got my hands on some self stable kombucha and fell in love with it. Only probablem was, it lit up my backside like no tomorrow. From my research, it seems like that is a side effect of introducing something with a high amount of probiotics into a system that isn’t necessarily used to it.

This got me thinking further, if my system is so damaged that I don’t have much gut bacteria, what would happen if I went ahead and made this yummy probiotic rich beverage a regular part of my diet? So I went ahead and bought a case of Kombucha Wonder Drink and set out on a quest to drink at least 8oz of kombucha every day.

What happened? Let’s get to that list!

1. More consistent bowel movements

Full disclosure, the first few days are rough as your body tries to figure out what the hell kind of poison you’re subjecting it to. After that though, things became more consistent. Daily bowel movements were the rule instead of the exception. The consistency was consistent as well. No more diarrhea or ER worthy bouts of constipation.

2. Less gas, less pungency

This is probably a by product of more regularity but my farts became less frequent but also less stinky. No more rotten egg farts. Bean consumption did not lead to more tooting. I only really noticed this because I am in Montana right now on a work retreat and have not had any kombucha in 5 days. Egg farts are back and I’m gassy most of the day. Perhaps that’s just traveller’s IBS, I dunno.

3. More energy

Kombucha is fermented tea. It contains some caffeine but nothing in relation to coffee, energy drinks or even unfermented tea. That being said, after drinking kombucha I always feel more peppy and noticed that I could get away with not drinking coffee pretty regularly. I’d say that it’s just a small bit of liquid courage because kombucha contains a small bit of alcohol, but I seriously doubt that’s the case.

4. It’s really easy to make and maintain

I lucked into getting a kombucha SCOBY from one of my wife’s friends. I wasn’t quite ready to get into making my own kombucha and was thrown into it head first. Turns out, it’s super easy! Add sweet tea to a bit of already fermented kombucha and the SCOBY and wait. Like most fermented things, the hardest part is the waiting. In about two weeks the Kombucha is ready to drink or be bottled. I’ll go into more depth on that process in another post.

5. It’s a great conversation starter!

Kombucha is one of those things that’s trendy as fuck right now so it ends up making a great conversation starter. I’ve been sharing the store bought stuff I got with my friends and soon enough I’ll be looking for a home for the baby SCOBY that is growing in my homemade batch. There’s a lot of mixed feelings out there about it, but for the most part, people hear “kombucha” and want to ask you about it.

So that’s been my experience with drinking kombucha on a more regular basis and how it has personally affected my gastrointestinal tract. As with most things, especially even remotely medical in nature, YMMV and you probably should see a doctor or something instead of trying to self medicate. Do as I say, not as I do!