I solicit and am solicited for feedback regularly. Before I knew any better, I would get defensive about things. I also could take the feedback as the gospel and action on things without much tangible evidence to back it up. Feedback needs to be taken in grace as well as with a grain of salt.
I was recently asked for feedback on something, I did what I am good at – giving my opinion. That’s the thing about feedback, it’s often just an opinion, generally one person’s opinion. It’s worth listening to and then figuring out if there’s anything actionable in there.
That said, if your first instinct is to go on the defensive, you’re not ready for feedback. You’re really just fishing for praise.
Honestly, there’s nothing wrong with that. As I’ve gotten older, I know when to ask for feedback and when to simply ask somebody to tell me I’m pretty.
While flattery isn’t always productive, you should be very away if your shit still stinks. Depending on where you’re at in the process, you may not be ready for critical feedback. Sometimes we just need acknowledgement that you’re working hard on something. Even when said something is imperfect at best.
Does anybody ask for feedback on their feedback?
There’s no reason to object to feedback because, again, oftentimes it’s just somebody’s opinion. Everybody you know is a fucking expert and you just validated them as such by asking their opinion on something.
Because of this, the person may shift gears to making sure they give you feedback, even when they don’t actually have feedback to give. You know, for the sake of it, but they are and expert and all.
If the feedback is good, it’s both actionable and able to be tracked. Unable to track the impact of a change to something? Shelve the feedback until you can track it. If you’re not tracking things, or even worst, doing so anecdotally or by way of vanity metrics, you’re probably not even ready for feedback.
Once you are at a point where you are tracking things, get that feedback, action on it when it makes sense and share the results with the person that gave you the feedback. Regardless of the end result, it’s good feedback for the person that gave you the initial feedback.
Also, if you have somebody continually give you feedback that is consistently wrong, you can stop wasting their time and maybe next time just ask them if they think you’re pretty.
